Friday, August 16, 2013

Week Three / MTC Life

Last Sunday we sang during Sacrament "Because I have been given much"... There is Power in that song.. Incredible. Music has been the best here. I feel more in-tune with the Spirit than ever before. It's awesome to have a companion who plays the piano. She is so talented. We try to go and practice everyday and I usually sit there and read my scriptures or practice my language... But sometimes I close my eyes and just truly listen to the hymns. I can't help but think about Parker and how amazing it was to always listen to his fingers dashing away at the piano keys at night. I can't help but think about him and how much his companion is going to love him at the MTC when he plays.

During our Sunday schedule we have a movie night where we can go see "Characters of Christ",  "Joseph Smith", or "The Testaments"... My companion and I decided we wanted to see The Testaments! Okay... I seriously think that is the best movie ever. The ending scene where Helaman is blind and he wants to be taken to the Savior because he has finally come to the people. Jacob, his son is crying because his father was waiting for so long, he was so strong in the faith.. and never gave up hope. While Jacob is leading Helaman to where the Savior is (this is what touched me most), Jacob tells his father Helaman he was so sorry and how much he wished he (Helaman) could see the glory of Christ and then Helaman cries to him saying "But you can see him, Jacob, and that is enough." I cried. I just can't get enough of how much our families, our parents truly love us. That if we are happy that is enough for them. It fills them up so much. It's such selflessness that I wish I could have more of. 

While we are out and about, while we are moving along in life or being a missionary to help others come unto Christ and bring back God's Children through love and through selfllessness and love is enough. Everyone deserves to see Christ again, everyone is worth it. I know if we love everyone without falter we are only building each other up. That we don't have to look at our selves but look unto others and help them know they are enough. It's a self-fulling prophecy all in it's self. And yes we are not perfect but just knowing the Atonement and repenting everyday. I am so grateful that God is willing to forgive me. Even if I can't believe it. God does. I can't express enough of how much I am grateful for my Savior everyday for his forgiveness. For His grace. That we can never repay him back. No matter how great we are in this life. But we just have to try and that is enough! 

We had a devotional on Tuesday by Elder Richard G. Scott. I wore my Elvish Pin on my skirt. It is like my lucky charm because I was so pumped to sing in the choir for Elder Richard G. Scott! "Jesus the very thought of thee" look it up! It's so beautiful how they portray Christ and when you sing it... It lifts you high up. Our choir teacher talked about how everyone always says if they get a chance to every see Jesus they would run up to him and give a big hug. But our choir teacher read a scripture of when the Savior returned after being crucified. And John the beloved... His close loving friend. When he saw Jesus... He fell to the floor. When we see Christ what will we do? I feel like I would be falling to the floor. I don't even know? Jesus Christ is amazing and oh how badly I want to be like him. He is what made us greater! He redeemed you and me to make a difference to make all the difference thus to make us different.... And I love him so much for that. 

Anyway back to Elder Scott he talked all about prayer and how we need to ask the right questions when we pray. And I kept on thinking what is the right questions? I feel like a lot of the time we pray a lot for ourselves and how can we be helped. The questions are based around us. But if we take the time... TO look more outwards. To pray for others. To ask questions of how can I be better for others? How can I help... It's amazing to see how much my prayer has changed and become so much longer!  Elder Scott was so uplifting and so loving. We were on the edge of our seats. He is like the spirit. You really have to be paying attention and trying to listen to get everything he says because he is a bit more quieter than others when he speaks. But if you are listening... You get so much out of it.
After the devotional my district squished in on the Czechs to talk about it afterwards with the Branch President. (A district meeting!) The Czechs are so ready. So awesome. The Spirit amazed me in that one hour. An Elder said that if we have enough faith when we pray we will get miracles and told us a quote of how we can just get that. "Obedience brings blessings. Strict obedience brings miracles." It really caught me. I need to really strive to be obedient and remember to always know my Heavenly Father is with me and through him I will have success! 

The language Slovene is really amazing  I really love how we talk and how we say certain things. To be honest, it's been a beast and I feel like I need to just keep on studying and praying! But our teachers are amazing and I really love when we learn about just being better and being the best missionary ever. Yesterday was one of those days that you really don't expect. It's been amazing and so fantastic in the MTC. Each of us were going to go one on one with a teacher and give a full lesson by ourselves, and I was preparing in the 3 minutes we had and I thought wow this is going to be crazy good. But when I got in to go teach... I was fumbling over myself. I didn't know what to say and I was so clueless. I was thinking how could this be? And why can't I be amazing at talking? I was feeling all down about myself. Things had been said to me and I was just not getting it.. And I just sat there with my teacher so frantic... I just all of a sudden I asked if I could pray in the middle of it for help. So, I got down on my knees and began to pray. I got back up and proceeded to talk about my purpose. Why I was out here. For them. For you. That I loved them. That their Heavenly Father loves them and that we can feel so small so worthless at points... but that through our Savior, through the love our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ- we are more! We are enough and I want them to feel as I feel. That the plan of happiness is to receive the fullness joy, this true church, this amazing gospel, and the best book out there... The Book of Mormon. I really can't get enough of it. After I was done my teacher and I were both crying. The spirit was so strong. I can't tell you how much our Heavenly Father really loves us and how much he wants for us to be happy and be successful. That if we just ask we will be blessed. That faith in Jesus Christ is the central point and if we realize and trust in him, Everything will be okay, because He has trust in us. He knows us all individually and He can make our weaknesses strong! 

Later that night we did TRC (kind of like a family home evening) and all of it was in Slovene.  My companion, Elder L, and I walked in and did awesome. We were a little worried cause we didn't really get to prepare but it was crazy to see the spirit come to our aide again. I never thought I could speak the language till last night. I just started speaking from my heart, and I even talked about how the chocolate milk is amazing. 

I hope you know I am thinking of you. I am so grateful for the plan of happiness. For the Grace Christ has for each of us. That we need to just get through the hard stuff and be better the next day, if we can.

Today we got to go to the temple. I wish I could stay there forever. I love you all. I really do. Thank you. Thank you so much.

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