I have been studying a lot on forgiveness this week and it's really touched my soul and always opens my eyes to truly see what is the real true happiness and how I can be a better daughter of God. I know I am not the best and I know I falter and fall down. But, I also know that I can be better, I can be more. I can share more love, more time. I can be kinder, more wiser. We live in a world surrounded by people and things and I just want to say now. I hope you can forgive me. Who ever you are, I hope I can make up my wrongs, I hope I can give you my heart and tell you you're the world and you are someone special, you are real, and I love you. Too forward? I like to think so... But hey, I would like to work on it and it's a good thing too. I hope we see our wrongs as something inspiring to move forward from. That our eyes can be opened to see that those mess ups can magnify us and make us be more incredible than we were. I hope we can learn this throughout our lives.
We are born into this world and so many people are telling us who we are, what to be... What we are not. We get side viewed and feel that what we once believed and thought was true is now on the line of question and do we really know who we are? I want to take a breath... and really think... Who am I? What do I like? What makes me, me? With out the influences, without all the people yelling and screaming you- that you aren't enough. It is bologna! God loves you for being you. I love you only because it is simply you and you are strong, you are definitely powerful, and you are changing the world. I know this. I feel this. I love this. Thank you for being the bees knees, the cats pajamas. You rock, now let's rock it, today.
We ran into a fellow at the library who kept asking us questions about our church. He was really intrigued in who we were and what our faith believed. He wanted to get a drink with us downstairs, so we decided we would accept and meet with him there.We felt pretty good about him and his lively character. As we made it down the stairs and we began to talk of religion and our testimonies he began to beam. He is one of those kids (He is in his late 20's) who has the talent of smiling with his whole face. He is kind of quirky in the fact I was talking to him and he asked for a cup of water from the cafe and took several packages of sugar and just started ripping them open and dumping heaps of sugar into his water and chugging it down while listening to me contently. Sister Dutton's face was priceless and I just kept answering his questions as if it didn't phase me. He began to rip the receipt the waiter gave him and the waiter had to come over and reopen up the tiny spit balls he was creating. He was acting like such a kid and I was really surprised that he was such a goof ball. I loved it to be honest, but I didn't know if he was taking anything I was saying to his heart. I thought maybe we should go but I looked up at him and he began to be very serious with me and told me some hard things that had happened in his life and that all he wanted was just to be happy. He then asked if we could help him find this happiness. With all the courage and love we had in us we exclaimed yes and got to teach him. It is amazing to see the transformation in seconds, days, weeks, months, years of people who begin to feel the gospel in their souls. It is what I live for and long for - for God's children. The spark that they are finally beginning to realize and awaken and remember their title, their true self in God's eyes. I feel my best self when I am seeing this and I am helping my brothers and sisters to this golden horizon, the morning call. As we started to finish up with our lesson I turned over to see the biggest bluest butterfly in the world. I had never seen such a big one here in Slovenija or that type before. It was raining hard outside and in the grayish rain the butterfly colored the background, it was sticking out and made me jump out from my seat. I believe that was my family saying hi to me in that moment. I couldn't help but to think of my mother and how she truly was the vibrant color in my life that spiced up and brought color to my world. It was a good moment.
We had many encounters on the street this week with people we knew or new faces that we shared God's sweet message with. One of our new investigators asked us how we can know what we are feeling is true and if it is not just our body reacting to good and we make believe what we want to feel hopeful for. I believe that God doesn't come to us in alien ways, he doesn't send whirlwinds to blow us down and tell us we are in a fiery pit. He tells us through familiarity, through small in simple ways... He goes to what we know and he goes to what is good and that we love and speaks through it. He can't physically hug us but he can give us our mothers to hug us. In all he uses everything he can in every good way and thought that comes your way to prove that he loves you and he wants you to seek Him. God is an incredible being who knows us by name. He loves us so much and he sees the bigger picture. He paints us like strokes on a masterpiece and says, ''there that was the finally touch, it's complete.'' He sees us as incredible creations and wants us to be incredibly happy. He wants us to build our lives and to love what we are doing and he knows that sad days come and all the emotions we so thankfully get and He is there in each one of our moments weak or strong. I know if we pray to know, if we seek to be with Him. You will know with assurance He is there and we are never on
I love you family have a one good week! Can't wait to hear about the reception!
|This picture comes from Holly's companion. Apparently is was a scary elevator.|